once upon a rainy day
by Ember Mage
Summary: 52 shades and flavors of the rain. Izumi x Meroko.
1. Kan, ya ma kan

**Disclaimer:** No property of _Full Moon wo Sagashite_ belongs to me. All characters and related titles are copyrighted to Tanemura Arina.

* * *

**Author's note:** These themes are done for the LiveJournal community 52flavours. I will also be basing the story off of the manga storyline since I have never seen the TV series.

There also will be spoilers for those who haven't followed the series to where I am at now, so read at your own risk!

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**once upon a rainy day  
Theme #1 - Kan, ya ma kan (Once there was, and once there was not.) **

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_There is a river called the river of no return  
Sometimes it's peaceful, and sometimes wild and free  
Love is a traveler on the river of no return  
Gone, swept on forever to be lost in the stormy sea_  
— **_The River of No Return_ by Marilyn Monroe**

* * *

Once there was a new hope. Though as thin and fragile as a thread, it glimmered with the same promise of a world free from pain. It was a promise of a next opportunity, a promise of a new life, a new beginning, and fresh love.

Meroko remembered this when she first became a shinigami. Some called it a blessing, others a curse, but whatever it was, she clung onto it desparately.

Although she had vowed never to fall in love again, she found herself more than happily content just by being with Izumi. She believed their partnership wasn't just a coincidence — out of many of the shinigami she knew, she felt that she could relate to Izumi the most. Although Izumi rejected her, coldly telling her the reality that she would be the one hurt if she continued to love him like this, Meroko felt that beneath his callous exterior laid a gentle soul, thirsting for warmth and love. Looking into his frigid eyes, Meroko shuddered, not because of his icy stare, but because his light-colored eyes was a mirror reflecting her own inner feelings.

Meroko was crestfallen when Izumi confessed that their shinigami team was going to break up, but her hopes were brought up when Izumi promised he would stay. Delighted with the matching clothes she received from him as a present, Meroko, touched with Izumi's dedication to Miru Meiku, was brimming with hope than ever.

It was only when she found out Izumi's other end of the bargain, that she would be the one breaking up the team, did her hopes fall. Rain fell and mingled with her tears, but the icy droplets of the rain did not hurt as much as the cold, numb feeling building up in her soul.

Once there was a new hope, but now, it was just as shattered as much as her broken heart.


	2. let x be the value of he who lies beside

**Disclaimer:** No property of _Full Moon wo Sagashite_ belongs to me. All characters and related titles are copyrighted to Tanemura Arina.

* * *

**Author's note:** These themes are done for the LiveJournal community 52flavours. I will also be basing the story off of the manga storyline since I have never seen the TV series.

There also will be spoilers for those who haven't followed the series to where I am at now, so read at your own risk!

* * *

**once upon a rainy day  
Theme #2 - let x be the value of he who lies beside me **

* * *

_Raindrops fallin' from heaven  
Could never wash away my misery  
But since we're not together  
I look for stormy weather  
To hide these tears I hope you'll never see_  
— **_Crying in the Rain_ by The Everly Brothers**

* * *

When Meroko woke up, she found her eyes damp and tears lacquering her pillow. As more tears began to fall, Meroko didn't understand why she was crying. It might have been the dream she just had.

Speaking of which, what _did_ she dream of? Meroko couldn't remember, but all that lay fresh in her mind was an anxious feeling, a sentiment that left her troubled and weepy. Sniffing, she sat up and from the corner of the room, she could hear the rhythm of raindrops plopping outside, leaving the air slightly frigid. At least the sky knew of her pain and was sympathizing with her.

"Me-chan, are you crying?" came a soft voice from beside her. At the sudden sound, Meroko nearly jumped and turned away, trying to hide her face. She knew the voice's owner all too well, and he was the last person she ever wanted to see her this way.

Meroko covered her face, desparately wiping fresh teardrops from her pink eyes. She couldn't bring herself to answer — she was afraid if she spoke, then she would burst out in hysteric wailing. As her shoulders shuddered from silent sobs, Meroko could only wobble her head back and forth as a "no."

Izumi, who had been awake for some time now, slowly removed himself from lying on his stomach. Reaching over to Meroko's futon, his stiff, thin hand grasped onto one of Meroko's arms, forcing her to turn to him. Gingerly brushing his palm against her cheek, Izumi softly confirmed, "So you _are_ crying." 

"I-It's nothing," Meroko choked out. Izumi could feel her body tense up, yet she didn't recoil from his touch.

"If it was nothing, I highly doubt you'd be in this much agony," Izumi remarked, the usual acerbity reserved in his voice toned down. 

"J-Just a bad... a bad dream," Meroko pointed out quietly, still furiously wiping away profuse teardrops. Izumi said nothing more and gently drew her into a taut embrace, comforting the crying girl in the safe boundaries of his arms. As usual, Meroko easily complied and did nothing to pull away.

Enfolded in a warm haven, Meroko clung tightly onto Izumi. "It's painful," he could hear her whisper in a shaky voice. "Why does it have to hurt?"

Izumi did not answer and remained silent, but he seemed to understand and did not press her with any more inquiries; still, he continued to hold her for what seemed like a very long time. Meroko no longer said anything, but continued to allow herself be in Izumi's endearing caress. The rain continued to fall from the foggy skies, silently drumming its mournful dirge.

At least there was someone to share the coldness with. At least it was quiet. 

_At least..._


	3. laws of variation

**Disclaimer:** No property of _Full Moon wo Sagashite_ belongs to me. All characters and related titles are copyrighted to Tanemura Arina.

* * *

**Author's note:** These themes are done for the LiveJournal community 52flavours. I will also be basing the story off of the manga storyline since I have never seen the TV series.

There also will be spoilers for those who haven't followed the series to where I am at now, so read at your own risk!

* * *

**once upon a rainy day  
Theme #3 - laws of variation**

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_I'm moving on, I know I'm done  
I'll find a place where I belong  
I'm not afraid, just like you said  
I've been disgraced just far too long_  
— **_Without You_ by ANNA TSUCHIYA inspi' NANA (BLACK STONES)**

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The next morning after that rainy day, by some unwritten law, her life changed. She wore black, but rather became fond of its blue and white counterparts. Trying to forget the harsh reality of the day before, she forced herself to smile and told herself that it was for the best.

The next morning after that rainy day, by some unwritten law, his life changed. He wore black, but rather missed its pink and white counterparts. Trying to forget the harsh reality of the day before, he forced himself to smirk and told himself that it was for the best.

She started out on the street, swishing her legs in a cheerful stride.

He started out on the street, casually walking as if he could care less.

From across the street, she saw him strolling stoically and tried not to stare at him, but his cunning golden eyes met hers. She wondered if he would sarcastically belittle her or scold her like he usually did, or would ignore her. She wanted to apologize, but wasn't sure if he'd accept it or laugh menacingly at her.

From across the street, he saw her prancing gaily and attempted to turn his attention away, only to find himself staring into her bright fuchsia eyes. He wondered if she would gallantly profess her love to her or apologize to him like she normally did, or would ignore him. He wanted to apologize, but wasn't sure if she'd accept it or reject him tearfully.

As the rain started to shower upon them, she barely even noticed that her hair was falling limp from the weather.

As the rain started to drizzle upon them, he didn't even realize that his clothes were being dampened from the weather.

Her actions would have varied, but she made up her mind and turned away, yesterday's tears flooding back to her. She wiped the last of her tears from her face, pushing the dreadful memory away, and continued moving ahead.

His actions would have varied, but he made up his mind and looked away, yesterday's guilt weighing down his heart once more. He tried to focus on a different topic, pushing the dreadful memory away, and proceeded going straight.

She knew the time was not right, and would never be. Maybe there would be a time where she could say sorry to him and settle things, but right now did not seem like the best time to do so.

He knew the time was not right, and would never be. Maybe there would be a time where he could apologize to her and heal wounds, and maybe someday there would be the best time to do so.


	4. to cut a bouquet of matter

**Disclaimer:** No property of _Full Moon wo Sagashite_ belongs to me. All characters and related titles are copyrighted to Tanemura Arina.

* * *

**Author's note:** These themes are done for the LiveJournal community 52flavours. I will also be basing the story off of the manga storyline since I have never seen the TV series.

There also will be spoilers for those who haven't followed the series to where I am at now, so read at your own risk!

* * *

**once upon a rainy day  
Theme #4 - to cut a bouquet of matter and antimatter roses **

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_I wanna need your love  
I'm a broken rose_  
— **_rose_ by ANNA TSUCHIYA inspi' NANA (BLACK STONES)**

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The first time Meroko met Izumi, she was a heartbroken, quiet girl dressed in snow white. She remembered that day clearly: the boss, with his protective hand on her shoulder, cautiously guided her towards her new partner. It had been a cloudy day, anticipating future rainfall, and the two had met in a garden with a surplus of various-sized crimson roses.

To Meroko, Izumi was like a rose — she could tell he had a kind heart, as beautiful as the bloom of a fresh flower bud, yet his heart was shielded by a forest of thorny brambles. The moment Meroko looked into his eyes that day, she recognized a trace of a look that was all too familiar — a look of pain that he so tried to hide behind his cool, pensive demeanor. From that day on, Meroko strove to bring that side out of him, regardless of how many thorns bruised her profuse love.

But that day... the day that they broke up... Meroko had never felt that hurt since her death until now. She had survived his incisive rejections, but the lash from the the sharp thorns tore her last hope. She had never bled so much pain since the last time she had been betrayed — not even when she ran the slick blade across her wrist when she was the innocent Rikyou Moe.

Retreating to behind the building where Izumi had kissed her, Meroko found an isolated rose lingering, embraced in brambles. Many of the petals had already fallen and drifted someplace else, but its beauty remained. The petals were jeweled with dew, and pearly crystals from the rain. Meroko gently reached out to touch it, but withdrew her hand in fear her clumsy, bumbling fingers would accidentally get caught in the barrier of thorns.


	5. entire orb of the satellite

**Disclaimer:** No property of _Full Moon wo Sagashite_ belongs to me. All characters and related titles are copyrighted to Tanemura Arina.

* * *

**Author's note:** These themes are done for the LiveJournal community 52flavours. I will also be basing the story off of the manga storyline since I have never seen the TV series.

There also will be spoilers for those who haven't followed the series to where I am at now, so read at your own risk!

* * *

**once upon a rainy day  
Theme #5 - entire orb of the satellite**

* * *

_I'll quickly spot a star a million light years away  
or the little bit of dust stuck to your shoulder  
I'm pretty proud of my eyes  
Every so often  
I'll get a peek inside the recesses of your heart  
and I'll blush, or occasionally get sad  
Lately my two lights seem to be losing focus_  
— _**Andromeda**_** by aiko**

* * *

Meroko wished on a star.

Sure, she knew it was childish, naive, and the like to wish on a star, but Meroko was never always the mature one. She could never hide her effervescing side for too long.

Meroko dreaded cloudy and rainy nights since the monochrome clouds would shield the midnight sky from view. On clear nights, she enjoyed sitting by the window glancing up at the jeweled skies, bathing in a beam of soft moonglow, even. Most often, she'd spot stars, the irregular lights emitting from airplanes, and other galactic objects she believed to be planets or satellites. She'd pick out constellations and trace her own starry patterns in the air with a finger.

Sometimes, when Takuto was awake, she would chatter endlessly about the stars, to which Takuto would eventually get sick of, responding by groggily pulling his pillow over his ears or pretending to be asleep. She'd ask Takuto to wish on a star with her, and Takuto's responses would vary depending on his mood; sometimes he would sheepishly do as was told, sometimes he told her to just get some sleep.

Sometimes, when Mitsuki was awake, Mitsuki would always eagerly wait with Meroko to see if they would spot a full moon that night. They would find as many constellations as they could, point out other celestial bodies, and make wishes together. 

Tonight, Meroko reserved a wish, a request, for her dear star. Spotting a distant light that sparkled distantly in the canvas of darkness, she began to send a wish. As the gentle white light from the moonbeams caressed her figure, she gallantly smiled and folded her hands as if in prayer, her fuchsia eyes closing in harmony with the coming of midnight.

Meroko had a wish that she kept repressed, a wish so private, repugnant, selfish, embarrassing, you name it, that she had left alone for so long. It had caused her to be afraid, but this was in the past; maybe now would make a difference. Now she found a great chance to bring it up; after all, the star had never belittled her like people in everyday life had.

_Starlight, star bright, first star I see tonight_, she started scrupulously, unbeknownst of a figure moving about from behind her.

_I wish I may, I wish I might have this wish I wish toni_— 

"Me-chan, you're still awake?" a voice spoke from behind her, sending a shock so electric up Meroko's spine. She heard herself shriek and in instinct, whipped around to see who would dare interrupt her serene moment.

"Did I scare you? I'm sorry." The smirk was evident from Izumi's amused tone. 

"Izumi-kun, you're supposed to be asleep!" cried Meroko in surprise, throwing herself away from the window and onto the futon as though she had been resting the whole time.

"You're one to talk," Izumi replied accusingly, taking a seat next to her blanketed body.

"You," started Meroko hotly, but Izumi clamped a hand over her mouth and drew her close to him by a forceful grip from his other hand. In response, Meroko's muffled voice screeched out in threats from under Izumi's palm.

"Mi-ki and Ta-kun are sleeping," Izumi stated calmly, at last silencing his ex-partner. "Have you forgotten that? Do you want to wake them up? I'm sure neither of them will be pleased."

The alarm went out of Meroko's eyes as she subtly relaxed — well, she would have calmed down fully if it hadn't been the fact of how physically close she was to Izumi. With a satisfied smirk and for only her to hear, Izumi softly murmured, "Tell me, Me-chan, what was it you were occupied with that made you stay up this late? It's not good for your beauty sleep, I suppose."

"Not if you tell me what you were doing first," Meroko shot back, but the moment it fell from her lips, she knew she would regret it. After all, what if Izumi had said that he was up at night to check up on Mitsuki or Takuto? An innocent and easy response from him did not seem like a fair trade for her embarrassing one. The last thing Meroko would tell Izumi anyway was that she was wishing on a star. Whatever the occasion was, she knew Izumi would mock her or tell her that such paltry things were for foolish little children.

Izumi stiffened, but looked away. "It doesn't matter what I was doing. I asked you first."

Meroko noticed his discomfort, no longer hot-headed as she had been previously. If she hadn't known any better, she would've thought he sounded a bit shy.

Still, it was rude to not give him an answer, and much as Meroko claimed that Izumi no longer pulled the strings of her glass heart, she couldn't _completely_ ignore him. With a shrug, she spoke, "It's like I said... I wasn't doing anything, Izumi-kun."

"Same," was Izumi's laconic response.

An awkward silence again settled between them. Meroko could no longer stand the stuffy atmosphere and got up, hopeful to find another window. She could even sleep in the living room tonight if she was tired; it felt weird to be in the same room with Izumi. As she ascended gracefully to her feet, a thin hand closed upon her wrist.

Meroko looked down, surprised by this gesture. Izumi's fingers were clinging onto her arm in a taut link, but his expression was indifferent. He wasn't even looking at her, but at the stars hanging in twinkling chains upon the midnight sky.

What surprised her even more was Izumi's words. 

"Me-chan, have you ever wished for anything?" Izumi asked pensively, lost in thought.

Meroko took a seat next to him, and his grip on her loosened. "Mm, yes, why?" 

"Nothing."

The bunny shinigami took one look at the stars, and then to Izumi, illustrating a correlation between the two. A secret smile pursed on her lips, she tried to keep the astonishment and humor away from her voice as she gasped, "Izumi-kun, you don't have to be so cool!"

Izumi's eyes widened as he shot to stare at her with a perplexed expression crossing his pale face. "What?"

"It's okay, go wish on a star if you want. There's no need to hide it." 

"Since when—"

"You're such a terrible liar, Izumi-kun." Izumi drew back at this remark with what looked like a slight _wince_, but Meroko took advantage of this "interest" in stars and didn't let him off the hook. "I'll wish for you if you want."

Izumi's eyebrows twitched at her suggestion. "Isn't there a code of ethics on this wish thing? Like, you're not supposed to tell anyone else your wish otherwise it won't come true?"

"I'll use up my wish for you. I never said anything about me telling you exactly what it was." Meroko gave a persistent smile as she waited for Izumi's approval.

His consent enthralled her. "Sure, go ahead, if that is what you desire."

Meroko's smile grew wider. "Gladly!" Slowly, she began folding her hands, closing her eyes, and calmly brought her secret desire out forth in a subliminal message for only the heavens to hear. It was hard to choose a wish for Izumi in general, but Meroko, knowing him from his pensive eyes that mirrored pain and isolation, enclosed a dream that was just perfect for him.

_Starlight, star bright, first star I see tonight. I wish I may, I wish I might have this wish I wish tonight..._

From what Meroko had seen, Izumi never seemed to have any fun, lest being entertained positively. Besides, it was fitting for everyone... even Meroko had wanted happiness, the happiness that had once fluttered out of her life.

_Please let Izumi-kun keep true happiness. I don't want him to be so sad anymore._

Meroko's heart gave a leap at her current gesture. Giving up her own wish in place of Izumi's actually seemed illogical if she no longer claimed to love him, but she could consider him a friend, right? Her mind was convinced, but her heart went the other way. Part of her was confused, the other half of her still longed to be with Izumi. She loved him, flaws and all, for who he was. She loved him since he was the only person she felt could reciprocate understatement. Most of all, she loved his smile, that genuine smile of his, not his sarcastic smirks. She wanted to see it often so she could know that he would be happy.

As her strawberry eyes opened, she turned to face Izumi to tell him she was finished. She did _not_ expect Izumi to be so close to her, and he didn't even make it better. His impulse to her widened eyes was to lean forward, causing his ex-partner to fall over on her back. "So, Me-chan, what'd you wish for before I came into the room?" 

Stunned, Meroko found a blush creeping upon her cheeks. Thank goodness it was dark and Izumi couldn't see it, otherwise he'd use this opportunity to make her pulse quicken intensely. Subtly squirming from his advancing figure, she cried, "I have _no_ idea what you're talking about!"

"Me-chan, I'm not the liar, but—" Izumi leaned his face close to Meroko's "— _you_ are. I can smell a lie from oceans away. That was what you were doing here, right?"

"I never said—" Meroko started to protest, but immediately halted as she saw Izumi's face come closer and closer. She shut her eyes tightly, helpless, waiting for his next move.

Silence.

Nothing. 

Nothing happened.

Meroko opened her eyes, and saw Izumi pulling away, to her confusion. Izumi just cocked another one of his mysterious grins at her and said in a teasing voice, "It's so much fun to torture you, Me-chan."

Meroko pouted and turned away. "I guess it was a bad choice to waste my wish on you."

Izumi was not at all insulted, but seemed more enlightened than before. He approached Meroko and gently turned her to face him, once again causing her to turn red. "Don't be mad, Me-chan," he cooed, breath caressing her cheeks. "I find it rather sweet of you to do something like that for me." He paused and hesitated for a second, slowly searching for her eyes with his own cold, glinting occipital sets. "Thank you. Do you mind if I reward you for this kind act?"

"I-Izumi-kun..." croaked Meroko, the proximity becoming too much for her. "I..." 

Her silent consent from her body language was all he needed. In a swift motion, Izumi pressed his lips upon Meroko's in a kiss, pushing her against the futon spread neatly on the floor. Despite their privacy, the stars were their only witness, still up in the skies glittering in their soft shines, free of rain and satellites. They glinted and mirrored their happiness bestowed upon them.


	6. A number, a letter

**Disclaimer:** No property of _Full Moon wo Sagashite_ belongs to me. All characters and related titles are copyrighted to Tanemura Arina.

* * *

**Author's note:** These themes are done for the LiveJournal community 52flavours. I will also be basing the story off of the manga storyline since I have never seen the TV series.

There also will be spoilers for those who haven't followed the series to where I am at now, so read at your own risk!

* * *

* * *

**once upon a rainy day  
Theme #6 - A number, a letter  
My love,  
I stand naked of my name.  
You are softwood and carbon.**

Write me into being. 

* * *

_A blue wind is now  
Knocking at the door to your heart, and yet  
You are merely gazing at me and smiling._  
**— _Zankoku na Tenshi no Thesis_ by Takahashi Youko**

* * *

The "ri" in "Izumi Rio" meant "benefit", but Izumi felt as if nothing had benefitted for him. Everything was indifferent, and he was still a pariah, someone casted away from everyone else, doomed to lead a life of eternal suffering. 

When he looked to his left and saw Meroko smile at him, he digressed these cloudy thoughts. As long as she's there, he feels that maybe there is a light shining down just for him, stopping the rain and parting the clouds, just to tell him that he isn't as pathetic as he renders himself. 


End file.
